Unless we take that first step into the unknown, we will never know our own potential.
— Alan Rufus
I just received a notice from WordPress: “Happy Anniversary with WordPress.com! You registered on WordPress.com 7 years ago.”
Seven years ago we were going to start a blog about Lawrence’s journey through dialysis. We were too exhausted to write. The blog was shelved.
Instead, it morphed into my journey through the wilderness.
In this post, I am going to choose one (or ten- I never follow my own rules) posts from each month of my grief to mourning to healing journey to prove to myself that I am, indeed, on the path to healing. This could be cathartic, or I could be asking for an off-the-rails evening, we shall see…
If you like, you can join along with me on this retrospective by following the links:
July 2019
Why I Write My first blog post
August 2019
Thoughts on Grief V I can’t wish you back, I love you too much to wish you pain
September 2019
Thoughts on Grief XXXIV A visit in the night
94 Days I feel confused and do not like it.
Thank you for LOVE My path was not to save, the lesson was to learn to LOVE and be loved.
October 2019
Moving Forward V Put one foot in front of the other
Lessons and Gifts I am enough
November 2019
Holes embrace the light
Out LOUD Truth is stranger than fiction
Faceless Demons Oh the irony of numbers
Worthy at 144 Days I am WORTHY
December 2019
Darkness when pure light shines the darkness can fully disappear
Counting Days in the Dark hanging on to the edge of a cliff by my fingernails
182.5 I will heal, I will be me
Christmas Reflections – In Loving Memory Of and Onward Ho
Are you Courageous? courage is something sorely lacking in my life
Matter or No Matter my “beginning of everything”
January 2020
Paradigm Shift be careful what one wishes for
Life — Period. Why is it that the person I see in the mirror is so focused on the things she wants to fix that she can’t (or won’t) see in herself what others see?
In the Beginning I don’t know where else to start but at the beginning
The Beginning Through the End the suffocating grief was nearly unbearable.
My Grief Journey Began I was a train wreck.
Daybreak and a Visit seize the day and be thankful
Strength II the only life I can really save is my own
February 2020 (what a month…)
Guilty as Charged I overthink
Buried, Excavation, and Returning the burial dirt has stained my soul
Acknowledging My Beast always fighting with myself
Inner Dialogue at 4am another visit…
Joyful Revelation(s) ginormous soul-shifting
Scars focus on the lessons
Epic “Pull Your Ass Back” Four words that literally saved my life
My Journey of Self Begins deriving joy while standing in shit
Facing Darkness living my best life with unbridled passion
March 2020 the transformation continues
Embracing the Weird Magic Within a brain-shift occurred!
When Lightning Strikes I am worthy
Excitement, Shadows, and Light light shining through darkness = sparkle
April 2020
Powerful and Wild trusting my wild
Mourning + Contentment = Healing & Moving Forward
Off the Rails waiting for the next destination.
Rona Musings Pushing the Pull Doors
May 2020
Rona Musings Sleep (It was a fluke)
Rona Musings Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve
There… in a very small nutshell, the highlights of my first 327 days without my Love. The pain wasn’t as great as I thought it would be, because I’ve lived it already. I was bracing for tears and instead I rejoiced at the chance to heal.
If you’ve made it this far and clicked every link, you get a prize.
XO Lisa
Grateful, Thankful, and Mending! 
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