My dreaded number
My self-proclaimed nemesis
(see Faceless Demons)
For some unknown reason,
I dreaded this day.
I let the numbers play
with my mind.
I thought all day
if I can get through
this day, 144
that I am home free.
I can make it through
anything.
It’s a wretched mind game.
One I still wrestle with.
Numbers.
Counting days
minutes
months.
A distraction from the
hard work of grief.
I am determined
(AKA stubborn)
I can make it.
I will make it.
I will not let this
beat me.
I will sing, dance, write, love.
do whatever I can to
make it!
I am worthy
to make it.
My love thought so…
I know so.
XO Lisa
Grateful, Thankful, and Mending! 
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Prayers Lisa! Death and grief, suicide is a hard thing to get through. My BIL from my first marriage committed suicide. I felt so guilty for a long while. Like it was my fault. I should have seen the signs…It took me some time to realize he didn’t want to be stopped. He had made up his mind. Prayers to you. I know it’s tough. 🙏🏼
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Thank you.
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Welcome 🙂
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I can’t seem to find anything to say… trying to refrain from thinking to finish this day
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