So I have to tell you something freaky that happened.

I have been listening to the song “Reason to Fight” by Disturbed nearly nonstop since Monday (the first time I listened it nearly broke me). After the 100th time it became comforting because I imagined my Love singing it to me. Now it’s my anthem reminder that I will survive.

Tuesday evening as I was listening while reading a book in bed I heard my Love say my name


just one word


It was his authoritative voice… probably telling me to get myself together.

After the shock subsided

and the tears started

I managed a soft “thank you, sir.”

You see, the book I was reading was one of the “Fifty Shades” trilogy by EL James. I was reflecting on how our lives were similar to those of the characters (without the intrigue, riches, youth, and beauty).

Like the fictional Mr. Grey, my Love gave up a lifestyle he enjoyed because his love for me was deeper.

In the process he tamed my wild, broken, untrusting soul with his strength and unconditional love. For that I will be forever grateful, blessed, and his.

I miss him so… but i did sleep all night for the first time in forever.

Truth can truly be stranger than fiction.

P.S. – I am still stubborn… some things will never change.

14 comments on “Out LOUD

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  8. Such a touching part of your journey…I vision that I will find peace in knowing my love will continue to watch over me someday or vice versa…

    Liked by 1 person

  9. As time passes it never takes the pain of loosing a loved one but we become stronger with Gods everlasting promise that he will always be there to pick us up!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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