Musings Gratitude Day 41

Today is one of those days and I have been on the struggle bus all day. However, I have committed to writing three things that I’m grateful for every day.

So here goes:

I am grateful that I can admit that I am on the struggle bus. Before that might not have happened because my pride would’ve gotten in the way.

I am grateful that even though I’m on the struggle bus I have no thoughts of killing myself. I realize that this too shall pass, that I am committed to living my best life. That my head is messing with my heart and I need to tell my freaking head to shut the fuck up so I can think with my heart.

I am grateful that I can realize that and recognize that. And I am grateful that now here in my safe space, my blog, I am telling my “head to shut the fuck up”.

I am grateful that I had the audacity to ask G-d for a rainbow and I didn’t see one. G-d does not run rainbows-R-us. In fact, what I should’ve asked for was guidance getting my shit together. And in the end, that’s what I did ask for.

I have suffered enough.

I have suffered enough.

I have suffered enough.

Besides the obvious, grieving and mourning, most of my pain has come from the thoughts in my head and consistently indulging in behavior that is not good for my soul. My intention is to stop that bullshit.

I will be brutally honest with myself.

I choose peace over pain.

I choose peace over pain.

I choose peace over pain.

I refuse to get on the struggle bus.

I refuse to get on the struggle bus.

I refuse to get on the struggle bus.

I will heal.

I will heal.

I will heal. Period.

XO Lisa