Grief is Universal

At one time or another, everyone will grieve someone.

It’s bound to happen.

The only things certain about life are taxes, death, and change.

I went to calling hours today (for those unfamiliar, a time set aside before a funeral to express condolences to the family). The blank looks, sadness, shock, swollen eyes, tears, and overwhelming sadness of the family were all too familiar. Grief, especially in the beginning, is brutal.

My point in telling you this

is to pose a question, or three.

What are your views on

an Author and Creator

of the universe?

I call the Creator G-d,

you may use another word –

it matters not.

Do you believe that everything

happens in the G-d’s perfect time?

If you or I are feeling guilt,

that we could have

saved our loved ones,

that we should have

recognized the signs,

if only this, if anything

who are we to question G-d?

What if we

couldn’t have done anything?

Why pile onto our grief

with if onlys

or I could and should haves?

Grief is excruciating, brutal,

it’s hard enough to

make it through the wilderness

without adding on guilt.

Instead of self-flagellation

and shame,

be thankful and grateful

that we loved someone

enough

to feel grief at their death.

Will we miss them? Yes

Will we be lonely? Absolutely

Will we cry? Of course

Lean into it.

Only by leaning into grief

will we get thorough it.

© Lisa P