303 TIME

“There are moments when I wish I could roll back the clock and take all the sadness away, but I have the feeling that if I did, the joy would be gone as well.”

― Nicholas Sparks

1579 days since Larry left earth for his last great adventure.

It’s been a long time since I started a blog post in this manner

However, the journey to this moment in time

has been long

and full of detours

some good

and many detrimental.

While in my grief and searching for answers phase there was not a single time when I didn’t feel a nudge in my soul that something just wasn’t right. Whether it was blaming God, consulting new age materials, or listening to people and ideas that weren’t in tune with my beliefs.

The soul nudges, many of which I ignored – especially in the beginning of my grief journey when I should have been relying on God the most for comfort, just kept getting stronger.

A particular passage in church this morning caught my attention:

⁸ I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
    I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.
⁹ Do not be like the horse or the mule,
    which have no understanding
but must be controlled by bit and bridle
    or they will not come to you.

Psalm 32: 8-9

I believe that my detours at that time of life were from a place of fear, but regardless of the root, the result was a great deal of confusion and mental anguish.

That mental state combined with strong soul nudges clearly communicating that I was going in a direction contrary to God’s will were all necessary to bring me to the perfect moment of understanding that God is ultimately in control of my life path.

I had to stop my stubbornness, ask for forgiveness, and lean on Him to find the peace that my soul desired.

C.S. Lewis sums it up more perfect than I when he wrote:

“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of – throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”

― C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

After God’s reconstruction I was finally able to stand steadfast in God’s promise of Isaiah 41:10:

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Do you feel or have you ever felt off track?

If so, do you or have you felt the soul nudge?

Did you ask forgiveness for your life detours?

Would you like to receive the forgiving grace and peace that comes from God?

If so, may I suggest visiting this website: Peace with God

Let me know in the comment section if you would like to share.

I wish you all Peace, Joy, and Blessings.

With Gratitude,

XO Lisa ❤️