297 Adventure Through the Reading Glass

“We will need to embrace the messiness while seeking order.”

– Minter Dial

I’ve been working on this post for quite some time – changing the number as I go along

Trying to find the right words to quell my tendencies to overthink myself…

It started while I was eating a bagel with cream cheese

Seriously?

Yes, seriously.

I am notoriously messy.

Nearly every shirt I wear when eating comes off, gets sprayed with stain removal stuff, and thrown in the laundry hamper.

It could be that I am overly endowed (TMI, I know) or my back curve keeps me from sufficiently bending over the table so spills go into the plate and not on me.

Bill is always saying that he is going to buy an adult bib. I think he’s kidding and only his embarrassment in taking me out in public with a bib keeps him from doing so.

But I digress…

I was eating a bagel with cream cheese…

afterwards I put on my reading glasses that were hanging around my neck (without looking) and had cream cheese in my eyes and on my nose.

Snapped a pic, cleaned them, then took another.

Which started the thought process that led to my brain asking a question:

“Why is what I see when looking at myself different from what others see when looking at me?”

Loaded question, right?

My brain has always been weird

“The more you overthink the less you will understand.”

― Habeeb Akande

I overthink everything

Then I think about why I overthink

Just another area for improvement

“They say, “Look before you leap.” So look. But do not look for too long. Do not look into the void of uncertainty trying to predict each and every possible outcome, to evaluate every possible mistake, to prevent each possible failure. Look for the opportunity to leap, and leap faster than your fear can grab you. Leap before you talk yourself out of it, before you convince yourself to set up a temporary camp that turns into a permanent delay on your journey into your own heart.”

― Vironika Tugaleva

However,

I cannot go through life without thinking

have never been a follower

I prefer to research and come to my own conclusions…

Some call me stubborn

a rebel

others who aren’t so nice call me a conspiracy theorist

and other not so nice names.

But my theory on today’s world is that my role is not to judge anyone

God is the only judge

Jesus instructed us not to judge others

“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. “

Matthew 7:1 

Paul advised

For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a fearful expectation of judgment, and a fury of fire that will consume the adversaries. Anyone who has set aside the law of Moses dies without mercy on the evidence of two or three witnesses. How much worse punishment, do you think, will be deserved by the one who has trampled underfoot the Son of God, and has profaned the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified, and has outraged the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay.” And again, “The Lord will judge his people.” …

Hebrews 10:26-31

I try to stay above the fray…

and work on myself.

My conclusion is that how others see me

is not as important

as pleasing God

and loving myself the way He created me.

For in the end I will stand before God

only for my actions –

not for what others think of me…

XO Lisa ❤️